Source of book: Audiobook borrowed from my brother.
This book is the third Diskworld novel, and the first in the
“Witches” series. We have previously experienced the first three in the
“Rincewind” series, and the first four in the “Tiffany Aching” series. The less
said about the abridged edition of Guards,
Guards, the better. If you want to read my thoughts on the other Terry
Pratchett books we have read, here is the list:
Rincewind:
Tiffany Aching:
Watch:
Guards!
Guards! (Stupid abridged edition, which is an abomination.)
Non-Discworld:
***
Equal Rites
features a character, Eskarina Smith, who disappears from the series until
reappearing as a rather unearthly character in I
Shall Wear Midnight. I’m not sure quite why, but it is what it is. It
does seem, however, that Tiffany Aching is in some ways what Eskarina might
have become as she grew older.
Eskarina is an anomaly in the Diskworld: a female wizard. In
the Diskworld universe, the number eight has magical properties. And, by the
laws of magic, the eighth son of an eighth son will be a wizard. An elderly
wizard named Drum Billet knows he is approaching death. (Like witches, most
wizards know when they will die.) He finds what he believes to be the eighth
son of an eight son, and passes his powers to the infant, leaving his staff
behind. The only problem is, he forgot to check the sex of the baby, and the he
turns out to be a she.
As she grows, Eskarina turns out to have wizard magic she
cannot control, and this concerns the local witch, Granny Weatherwax (who would
become a recurring character.) Granny decides to take Eskarina to Unseen University
(where the wizards are trained), to learn how to use her powers. The journey
takes up a good bit of the book - and it is obvious that an 8 year old girl
with an attitude and unpredictable magical powers will be a tough assignment
for Granny, who hasn’t left the village much before. Eventually, the story
takes a turn to the Dungeon Dimensions, where Eskarina and a young wizard,
Simon, have to figure out how to get back to the “real” world. I won’t spoil it
more than that.
One of the things that struck me about this book is just how
much Granny Weatherwax changes in the 20ish years between this book and The Wee Free Men. In this book, she is a
rather ordinary village witch. She is wise, but illiterate and very provincial.
She lacks the confidence and calm of the later books. Oddly, she also
seems...older somehow. Clearly, she expands as a character as the series goes
on, eventually becoming the unofficial head witch, with experience and
knowledge extending far beyond her village. Perhaps this epic trip to
Ankh-Morpork is the beginning of the expansion of her world and the start of
her personal growth. It remains to be seen, I guess.
This audiobook was different from all the others we have
listened to in that it has a female narrator: Celia Imrie. I had no idea who
she is, but apparently she was a regular on British television and stage.
Whatever the case, I thought she did a fine job. Considering the delightful
Nigel Planer and Stephen Briggs are the gold standard for Pratchett, this was a
tough gig. Particularly good, in my opinion, was the way she voiced the various
wizards. They were different from each other, but shared a certain reedy
stuffiness which was quite fine. She also gave Granny Weatherwax a more
stereotypical witch voice than Briggs does in the later books - but the books
themselves dictate a different tone. It was definitely an interesting set of
choices that I thought was well done.
(On a not entirely unrelated note: Yes, this was the
unabridged version of the book. I checked. Don’t settle for less.)
There are so many fabulous quotes in this book. I’ll share
just a few.
‘If a thing’s worth doing, it’s worth
doing badly,’ said Granny, fleeing into aphorisms, the last refuge of an adult
under siege.
That one made me laugh out loud. It is way too true, and my
kids presumably know it.
‘They say a little knowledge is a
dangerous thing, but it is not one half so bad as a lot of ignorance.’
One of my all-time favorite Pratchett quotes. It has been
discouraging to see knowledge and expertise so disrespected in our times.
As I noted, Granny Weatherwax is fairly inexperienced in
things outside of her village in this book. Here is one exchange that shows the
typical Pratchett turn of phrase.
‘You said there was some sort of
teaching place?’ he hazarded.
‘The Unseen University,
yes. It’s for training wizards.’
‘And you know where it is?’
‘Yes,’ lied Granny, whose grasp of
geography was slightly worse than her knowledge of subatomic physics.
Likewise, while she can read and (sort of) write, she limits
herself to the Almanac, rather than books. Until later in the story at least.
For the first time in her life Granny
wondered whether there might be something important in all these books people were
setting such store by these days, although she was opposed to books on strict
moral grounds, since she had heard that many of them were written by dead
people and therefore it stood to reason reading them would be as bad as
necromancy.
And then, there is this scene where Esk wanders into a
disreputable pub:
The landlord, whose name was Skiller,
found himself looking directly down at a small child who seemed to be squinting.
‘What?’ he said.
‘Milk,’ said the child, still focusing
furiously. ‘You get it out of goats.
You know?’
Skiller sold only beer, which his
customers claimed he got out of cats.
Or this gem, which is all too true, particularly here in California where people
pay to get tans despite the fact that we have an abundance of sunshine.
He had the kind of real deep tan that
rich people spend ages trying to achieve with expensive holidays and bits of
tinfoil, when really all you need to do to obtain one is work your arse off in
the open air every day.
Pratchett, even in his early work, is clearly a feminist.
There are zingers throughout this book about the Patriarchy and those who
support it.
If you were a boy I’d say are you going
to seek your fortune?’
‘Can’t girls seek their fortune?’
‘I think they’re supposed to seek a boy
with a fortune.’
Social commentary abounds, as in this depiction of the
tribes which dominate the river trade, and have designated persons to do their
negotiating.
Zoon tribes are very proud of their
Liars. Other races get very annoyed about all this. They feel that the
Zoon ought to have adopted more suitable titles, like ‘diplomat’ or ‘public
relations officer’. They feel they are poking fun at the whole thing.
Religion doesn’t escape Pratchett’s teasing either, although
he wasn’t completely hostile to it. Having had a bit too much experience with
toxic and hateful religion myself, I think he is right about this one:
[G]ods were always demanding that their
followers acted other than according to their true natures, and the human
fallout this caused made plenty of work for witches.
And one final one, which I really wish I had thought of.
It is well known that stone can think,
because the whole of electronics is based on that fact...
I am, of quartz, writing this on my computer, which is
indeed a quite gneiss example...sorry. Couldn’t resist.
Equal Rites isn’t quite as funny as the Rincewind books, or
as philosophically deep as Pratchett’s later books. However, still very
enjoyable both as a story and as social commentary.
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