The Ten Loves of Nishino by Hiromi Kawakami

Source of book: Audiobook from the library

 

For some time, I have had The Briefcase (also known by the alternate title of Strange Weather in Tokyo) by Hiromi Kawakami on my reading list - it seems to be considered her best book. However, it has been beastly trying to find a copy to borrow. Instead, it turned out that the wait wasn’t too long on The Ten Loves of Nishino, which sounded intriguing enough. 

 

An alternate title, which I actually think is better, is The Ten Loves of Mr. Nishino, because his actual name is Yukihiko Nishino. However, throughout the book, both names are used. Interestingly, the last name is used more often, including by schoolmates and peers. Also, it is used by the younger women in the story. In contrast, there are a couple of women who are either of the same age or older than he is, who feel close enough to use the first name. 

 

The interesting idea behind the book is that Nishino is the main character, yet we never hear his perspective. Instead, the book is narrated in turn by the ten women (or girl in one case) who are romantically involved with him over the course of his life from his early teen years to his sudden death in his fifties. 

 

Each of the women is different, and their perspectives of Nishino are different as well. 

 

Who IS he? 

 

The book at one point describes him as a “womanizer,” but I’m not sure this is universally true throughout the book. Yes, he sleeps around, and sometimes with more than one woman. But he isn’t in to the thrill of the chase, and doesn’t seem to be leading the women on. 

 

In trying to find information on the names of the women (spelling off an audiobook is challenging, to say the least), I ran across writeups that saw Nishino as a stand-in for all the horrible men women date, but I didn’t get that vibe at all from the book. 

 

Nishino is a complicated character. He has a tragic backstory, as we find out. He struggles to find genuine deep connection with women, but the women themselves have the exact same struggle in connecting with him. They are equally commitment-phobic. In fact, they are more so, as several turn down Nishino’s proposals, either for a more committed relationship, or marriage itself. 

 

One of the stories includes a scene that is pretty rapey by modern standards - she says no, but he persists. And yet, she is in a position of power over him, as his boss, and rather than punish him, she chooses a relationship. And then eventually dumps him. So, it isn’t a clear case of power. 

 

More often, throughout the book, Nishino comes off as a genuinely nice guy, but one who is too haunted to fully give and experience emotional intimacy. And likewise for the women, who actually are less emotionally vulnerable, on average, than Nishino is. 

 

Without getting too far into the plot details, I want to note that the AI generated summaries online are shite. Utter shite. This is unsurprising, because AI is not “intelligence” at all, just predictive text. It does not understand the book at all. Hence, ignore the character list. Except for the spellings, which I did check to see if they were legit, and re-listened to where they are mentioned in the book. 

 

There are ten total women (or girls), and each tells the story of their relationship with Nishino. The stories are not in chronological order, but jump around a great deal. In some ways, the book starts with the end. Nishino’s shade visits one of his past loves - perhaps his greatest love? - after he dies, and asks her to “bury” him in her garden. 

 

Because the AI character list is so terrible, and I was unable to find better information, I will list all the women here, with a bit about them that actually makes sense as part of the book. If you don’t want spoilers, skip this section. 

 

I would say that the main theme of the book is the achingly difficult problem of human intimacy. And I don’t mean sex. Many of the characters fuck without any emotional intimacy at all. Others - Nishino included - often try to combine the two, but sex is physical and easy compared to moving past attraction to a deep, intimate love. 

 

This is why I think the analyses that claim the book is a “feminist” screed against worthless men miss the point badly. Nishino is no villain, and he is not intended to be. He is no better or worse than the women who come in and out of his life. The tragedy isn’t about him, but about the failure to connect, the inability of all of the people in this book to allow themselves to bond fully with anyone else. 

 

To know and be known is a difficult thing, painful and vulnerable and raw. To know and be known and to pair bond over the long term is both incredibly beautiful and also rare and fragile to maintain. 

 

I am reminded of a song from my childhood, by Keith Green, about his own marriage. 

 

You want to love with me, love with me then

I only ask that you still be my friend

For there are many where friendship's unknown

They live together, but really alone

 

And the days go their ways in silence

Tense hours of woe

We do not mean to have it so

 

I know that sometimes I'm harder to love

I thrash out blindly like nothing's thought of

So won't you help me to help you be sure?

God only knows that I want to be pure

 

But the world keeps its promise daily

Pulling me down

But it can't hide what I have found

 

So I will love you and love you, I do

It's not complete yet, but you know we're not through

And the days go their ways in blessings, moments of truth

We truly dare not waste our youth

 

So many live together, but really alone - indeed, that is the story in this book. Nishino is so close, and yet so far, from the intimacy he craves. And he really does crave it more than the women he loves, most of whom break up with him shockingly casually. The “what if?” question hangs over the entire book. While a few relationships seem obviously doomed, the others could easily have resulted in happiness for both…but don’t. 

 

Kawakami’s writing is concise, yet filled with everyday detail. Each of the ten women feel unique, with their own voices. For a fairly short book, it makes the most of its space to flesh out the characters and emotional landscapes. 

 

I found it to be a thought-provoking book, with unexpected delights along the way, even as the overall pervading mood is one of sadness and regret. 

The audiobook was narrated by Cindy Kay, who did a great job with the voices. Nishino in particular has a lovely understated voice that fits his personality. The translation is by Allison Markin Powell.  

 

Here are the women, in the order they tell their stories. 

 

Natsumi: 

 

She is a married woman having an affair with Nishino during his middle age. She and her young daughter meet him away from home, and he always buys the daughter a parfait, even though she dislikes them. When Nishino’s shade comes to visit after his death, she gives him a tiny gravestone in her garden, which allows him peace at last. Is she his true love? 

 

Shiori: 

 

This is the first in chronological order, a schoolhood friend who shares a kiss with Nishino. However, she isn’t really into him, so they never become an item. This is where we first hear about Nishino’s older sister, who lost an infant daughter. Shiori also witnesses some weird stuff between Nishino and his sister, which we learn more about later. 

 

Manami:

 

This is the one which starts off with “Nishino is an animal,” and the rape scene. She is his supervisor at work, a few years older. She dumps him after deciding he is incapable of love. But is it she instead? This is where the book's ambivalence is at its height. Is Manami ultra-perceptive and can see that Nishino can’t commit? Or, and this is arguably more likely, is she projecting her own fear of commitment onto him? 

 

Kinoko: 

 

She is his girlfriend during his 20s. They have a fairly long relationship (by the standards of this book) that seems good. It ends when Kinoko, for reasons even she doesn’t understand, leaves Nishino for a man she doesn’t even like. Many years later, when Nishino is with Manami, she runs into them - we get a really awkward “you slept with him” moment, which is told from both perspectives. At that point, Kinoko is filled with regret for leaving Nishino, and tries to convince him that they should try again. But it is too late. 

 

Reiko: 

 

She is an author, a good bit older than him, who is sexually aggressive. The story starts with her thinking, “I want to have sex with him,” and gives him a brazen come-on. And ends up staying for a whole week. For her, the problem is that she wants to be independent, and doesn’t want Nishino to be any more than a quick, fun fuck. 

 

Tama: 

 

One of two stories set during Nishino’s college years. Tama is a roommate with Subaru, who is dating Nishino at the time. One night, Tama and Nishino fuck, are discovered by Subaru, who ends not only the relationship, but moves out. The interesting thing about this one is the amusing story of how Tama and Subaru ended up roommates in the first place - it involves a refrigerator, which Subaru names. And indeed, I think the two of them cared more about the appliance than Nishino. There is also the problem that Tama and Subaru have a thing for each other that neither will admit.  

 

Eriko: 

 

She is a neighbor, and she and Nishino initially bond over their shared love of a stray cat who adopts Eriko, and who she names Mao. This relationship also could have been viable, except that Eriko, who is divorced, has no interest in risking her heart again, and is emotionally unavailable. Nishino proposes, but she turns him down.

 

Sayuri: 

 

Significantly older woman - in her 60s, and married with adult children. Nishino is about 30 in this story. They meet at an “Economy Cooking” class. It is unclear if they even have sex, or if he just confides in her. He ghosts her and the class eventually. In fact, I think this is the only story in which Nishino initiates the breakup. 

 

Ai: 

 

This story comes chronologically last in Nishino’s life (not counting his afterlife.) Ai is a college student who works at a concession stand in the vacation town where Nishino is visiting. He is 50 at this point. They have kinky sex, but she never loves him. He dies in an accident during the relationship. 

 

Nozomi Masuno: 

 

The only woman as far as I remember, who gets two names. She becomes Nishino’s college girlfriend, after a fashion. She sleeps around - 5 guys in one week, and even more - but she insists that she is choosy - she only fucks men that interest her. Nishino confides his secret about his sister to her: that she eventually committed suicide, and Nishino is wracked with guilt that he wasn’t there to stop it. This combines with the crush he had on his sister (who was 10 years older) that he hasn’t really processed. Nosomi herself realizes that she has never been truly emotionally intimate with anyone - Nishimo bares his soul to her, but she does not reciprocate. 

 

***

 

Trivia Fact:

 

The character of Subaru is not named after the car. Subaru is the transliteration of the Japanese word for “Pleiades,” the star cluster. 

 

In mythology, there were seven sisters, but one disappeared. This has led to the incorrect belief that you can only see six of the stars with the naked eye. This is untrue. If the night is dark and you have decent vision, all seven can be seen reasonably well. 

 

The Pleiades are an actual star cluster. Unlike most constellations where the stars only appear near each other, but are in fact quite distant, the Pleiades is a group of stars clustered in space. There are far more than we can see with the naked eye - Gallileo catalogued thirty-six of them, but with our modern equipment, we know there to be at least 1000 of them - some are binary or even multiple stars that are not oriented in a way that we can confirm the exact number.

 

The car company took the name when they combined five smaller companies into a sixth, larger one. The Subaru logo is a stylized version of the Pleiades - but with only six stars, reflecting the myth.