Settling Down

Time flies so fast. This month marks 10 years since we moved into our current home.

This is the longest that I have ever lived in any one place. In fact, it has been longer by a good bit. The previous record was all of 7 years. (That’s just how life, jobs, and circumstances worked out.)

I was thinking about this lately, because I am not one who embraces change. I am, shall we say, a bit of a stick-in-the-mud when it comes to the foundational elements of my life. I like adventure, but I like my home to be there when I am done. I am not a natural risk taker, as my wife had noted quite often. I am a “plodder,” not a conqueror. (The fact that I actually started my own law practice has to be a surprise to anyone who knows me - myself included.)

So, it is interesting to find myself in middle age, having attained a degree of stability that I probably always craved, but never truly was sure of having.

It isn’t just the house, either.

I grew up (mostly) in the Los Angeles area. San Fernando Valley to be more specific. (Think Moon Unit Zappa’s “Valley Girl.” I still talk a bit “like” that.) Still, I lived there from age 3 to 16. (Also from birth to 2, but I don’t remember that much.) That’s 13 years in more or less the same town. I’ve made it 16 in Bakersfield. Time flies.

I realized too that it has been more than 12 years since I opened my office. Nearly two decades in the Symphony. Nearly 12 years since I became a father. And nearly 14 years since I married the lovely Amanda.

The most surprising, though, I think has to be the fact that I have attended the same church for over 15 years. That’s pretty unprecedented. I think the longest our family ever attended the same church must have been 4 or 5 years when I was really young. The others have all been 3 years or fewer. Some of those were due to geographical moves, but more happened because of bad situations. So, I really do have to credit the good people (and good leadership) at our current home as a significant reason why we have been able to stay.

I suppose it does feel a little weird to look back and see a longer period of stability than I expected. I’ve “settled down” so to speak.

Actually, if I think about it, I am - in my own way - living my dream. I did in fact imagine a house in the suburbs, full of the world’s best kids, a beautiful and loving wife, enough free time for books and hiking and field trips and music. We all have our dreams, and mine is perhaps a bit mundane, but it’s mine after all.

Here’s to “settlin’ down” and the ordinary life...